It is not surprising that in today's "got to look good" society, facial blushing can cause people a lot of stress and worry. At its extremes, the embarrassment from blushing can become so acute that the sufferer avoids social contact as a last resort to avoid the problem.
So what can you and Hypnotherapy do to help yourself to control your blushing?
Acceptance
The first thing to understand is that blushing is a perfectly natural human response. Everybody blushes, of course some people blush more than others but it is a reassuring fact that blushing is a matter of degree, not whether you do or don’t blush. It is a natural occurrence. When you blush, the blood vessels in your face widen allowing more blood to pass through to the skin. The tiny muscles in your blood vessels usually keep the vessels slightly squeezed, but during a blushing episode, nerves in your body send signals to relax these muscles. Because this action is an automatic response, it is nearly impossible to stop once the action has begun. In fact, the harder you try to stop blushing, the redder you will usually get. Acceptance is the first step to controlling your blushing.
Relax
Blushing tends to increase as people start to get embarrassed about their embarrassment, creating a sort of vicious circle. The tenser you get as you start to blush, the more the blood is forced to the face. One trick is, when you feel it coming on is to deliberately drop your shoulders and relax your body. Breathe through your stomach, pushing it out as you breathe deeply and calmly, focusing on calmness or what is happening around you rather than not blushing. This can take a bit of practice to become second nature, so practice deep breathing and focusing on other things on a daily basis. You can learn all of this and more with a Hypnotherapy, CBT & NLP session with Erika.
Accept it, don't Fight it
You need to shift your relationship to the blushing. At the moment you are trying to hide it because you are embarrassed about it. If you can work on relaxing about it, it will get better. This will be helped by you accepting it as a current part of yourself. You can try saying to yourself "At the moment, I am a blusher". It sounds strange, but if you can bring yourself to like that part of you more, it is more likely to go away.
Hypnotherapy can introduce you to some techniques that you can employ and keep working with on your own in the future.
Other peoples' opinions
Part of the embarrassment about blushing is caused by the thought that others will see you as weak or silly. However, everyone has had the experience of being embarrassed, it shows in people in different ways. Even people who appear as very confident have their moments of self-consciousness. Remember too that often it can seem a lot worse to you then it appears to be. People are so self-absorbed that they probably haven’t noticed you blushing; in fact it is often only your own change in behaviour that draws attention to it. Does this sound like your experience?
People tease you
If people tease you and point out your blushing they tend to do this because of your reaction to them. If when they tease you, you are able to smile with them, it will usually lessen the impact of their joke and make it less likely that they will push that button in the future. This can be done in a healthy way that does not internalise your anguish, but instead shares it!
Retrain your mind
Hypnotherapy can help greatly as you can train your mind and body to relax as you feel the blushing coming on, or have the thought that you might blush. Hypnotherapy can help you to feel more confident and at ease with the situations that make tend to make you blush.
Your Standards
Remember, you are an unique individual. Like everyone else you have different factors that contribute to make you the person you are. Accept yourself for all that you are, blushing is just one of those things that make you you. The more you accept it the more you won’t mind if it happens. The more you don’t mind the less it will happen as you refind that inner confidence in you.
Ring Erika for a no obligation chat and see how along with your commitment hypnotherapy, CBT and NLP can help you achieve your goals.
By Erika Keat
Erika offers Hypnotherapy, CBT & NLP at Waterloo Therapy Rooms on Wednesdays all day, please contact Erika for more information.
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